You have to pay with a briefcase of cash!

Your favorite uncredentialed pigskin pundits return for the first episode in nearly two months to talk about all the things that haven't really happened since the NFL draft. In this pre-pre-pre-season episode, the Bluethers discuss the podcast's bleak financial outlook and what you can do to help change that. They also break down their shared cultural imprint with Lost and Friends.

Zach and Willys chat about the newly intimidating and lovable Cleveland Browns and the blistering Odell-ness of wearing a $200,000 watch to participate in football practice.

Fun ensues. This might just be the greatest episode of An Inconvenient Blueth that isn't called "It's a toe episode!"

The bass is going right over this part!

With Gettleman's draft ars poetica in the books, the Bluethers return from another mandatory cool-down period to discuss the selection of Daniel Jones, the close call with Josh Rosen, and how to proceed with Giants fandom in the face of increasingly bewildering incoherence from the front office.

In other words, this is the 2019 draft recap you never knew you wanted.

It's interesting artificial intelligence!

Back from their mandatory cool-down period following the Odell Beckham trade, Zach and Willys discuss their impressions of the Giants' offseason so far. With the most interesting player on the team now playing for a franchise that's famous for losing, they ponder what they will talk about going forward and how they'll continue to deliver #premiumcontent to the ever-deserving Ones. They also analyze how likely a Josh Rosen acquisition for Big Blue really is, and take a quick look at what the club will do at the draft later this month.

Other topics discussed include robots that play instruments, sushi, Zach's superhuman ability to stay awake, and some hot microphone shade.

Were there any stats‽

The Bluethers welcome back special expert and resident New England sports correspondent Ethan Rothstein to break down one of the least entertaining Super Bowls in years. The gang discusses how little there was to discuss, how hard it is to root for Boston sports teams, and how buckets of undefined food make America truly one-of-a-kind.

Other topics analyzed in this episode include when identity theft may be legal, where not to buy chicken tenders, and how the episode sign-off needs more practice.

Listen up, Ones, and happy offseason!

As always, our introductory theme music is composed by Kevin MacLeod. You can find more of his work at incompetech.com.

Our theme starts with a few seconds of "The Curtain Rises," and quickly fades into "Take a Chance." Both pieces are licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License. For more information on the license, visit http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/.

Ethan, say Blueth!

The Bluethers welcome a very special guest to the show this week: Mr. Ethan Rothstein, a fan of nearly everything from Boston and Dave Matthews. The newly formed triumvirate preview the Super Bowl, discuss officiating and the infuriating ending to the NFC Championship Game, and make a quick round through baseball's offseason. They also spend some time on whether and/or when Josh Rosen will appear on the pod. To top it all off, Ethan leaks extremely important national security secrets, so tune in for that if nothing else.

As always, our introductory theme music is composed by Kevin MacLeod. You can find more of his work at incompetech.com.

Our theme starts with a few seconds of "The Curtain Rises," and quickly fades into "Take a Chance." Both pieces are licensed under Creative Commons: By Attribution 3.0 License. For more information on the license, visit http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/.